Mask

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Smiling is painful
But it keeps the tears from spilling over
I will play the roll of happiness
Pretending that I don’t cry
Block out my emotions
It makes myself seem stronger
I am not dying inside
I am not hiding away
I lie
Because, as far as they know,
I am fine
The mask is a happy face
The mask makes me a liar
The true me has never been content
My appearance is a pretty smile
Calm and controlled
Under the surface I am alone and afraid
I shall only show you what you desire to see
If you knew the truth
I would disappear
The mask is medicine
It heals my scars
At least for now
Until I break down
The mask is growing on me
I long to break free
I do not know how
The mask is seeping into my skin
Do not let me become unfeeling
I don’t want to be numb
But I cannot stand pain
And happiness feels so unreal
It never lasts
It is a big bright bubble
And it dies with a sudden “pop”
I cannot let it dieI peel off the mask
I see the world with my eyes
I am rid of the masks clutches and lies
Here is me
The real me
Take in the fresh air
Breathe.